April 19

Juliane Poirier Lent 2019

     As I read the title theme, the narrative, and the Scripture, I was struck with the three questions that sum up my life journey; (1) Who am I?; (2) Where do I belong?”; (3) Why I am here?  As I tell our youth in different groups, I am still trying to answer those questions at the age of 70!

     As I thought of writing this devotional, I keep thinking about a dark time in my life.  My brother Bill, was a troubled soul who fought drug abuse and depression for most of his adult life.  Eventually, he couldn’t endure the fatigue of life and committed suicide.  On the night of his death, as I lay awake in bed, I had never felt more alone in my life.  Over the following days and weeks as a grieved this loss, I struggled to make sense of Bill’s death.  It was not that I had not experienced tragedy, since I had been a Probation Officer for over 10 years.  I had seen many “lost souls” and I was familiar with suicide, drug abuse, violence etc.   But over time, I slowly and quietly began to feel a stronger resolve to understand and help my clients.  I was taking more chances to give people an opportunity to change.  After making particularly difficult decisions or during a particularly tiring day, I would say a little prayer;  “I do this in honor of my brother Bill.”  My brother’s tragic death, among other things, may have added to my purpose in life. 

Prayer:  Dear Lord may my bother’s soul rest in peace. Amen

Mike Robak

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